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Saturday, October 23, 2010

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Posted by Matt Beers at 6:54 AM

Matt Beers: I have a number of amazing talents, not the least of which is the ability to enter a room with a specific errand in mind and to come within mere inches of my goal before getting distracted by something shiny. In more relevant news, I am a 32 year-old white American male with a white American wife and three white American children. We try not to turn up our noses at the rest of the world, but it sure is hard sometimes, especially when the rest of the world is so far away. My wife, Betsy, and I are daycare providers. She is a photographer and scrap-booker and I... doooo... nothing, really. I write a bit and I draw a bit but mostly I read books and watch movies and play video games and listen to music. I am an appreciator of other people's abilities. Read more. Thanks for reading more. I am currently tipping the scales at a very mediocre 220 pounds. Considering that I am barely five-and-a-half feet tall, this raises some concerns for my wife. She always knew she would outlive me, but she was hoping she'd at least have a chance to smother me with a pillow in a retirement home somewhere. In my present state, I won't see sixty. That seems like a comfortably depressing place to end.

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